Welcome to the new pussy society where if you don’t care about a Kardashian dicing up “her” dick, you are a bigot.
“She” has arrived, in case you are currently busy living in a cave pooping berries into an iron bucket while carving stick figures fucking each other on your stone walls and happened to miss it. “She” is actually a dude that was a man who banged women who is now a woman who will not bang men – who started a reality show that everyone hated and used it to get “his” dick cut off to become a “she” and didn’t name “herself” using a “K” in order to throw shade at the same reality show that “he” used to make money from before “he” was a “she” who probably still now makes money from it.
In case you missed all this, of course, I just wanted to catch you up.
Now on to more important business. How does one know whether or not you are a bigot? Believe it or not, it really isn’t as confusing as it may seem. To help matters, I interviewed a very typical American bigot to help you see if you are also a bigot. If your responses are anywhere similar to this bigot’s answers, then you yourself are a fucking bigot also.
Do you give a fuck about Bruce Jenner becoming a broad?
Bigot: I do not give a fuck. I don’t care, he or she can do whatever they want, but I don’t care and am unclear why this is overtaking my goddamn Facebook newsfeed, CNN, Sports Illustrated, Fox News and ESPN. Fucking ESPN man!
You are a fat faced bigot.
Did you share the Vanity Fair article and refer to Bruce, who is now Caitlyn, as a “she” or “her” or any kind of feminine pronoun?
Bigot: No. I really don’t fucking understand why on earth I’d share this?
Bigot.
Do you think Bruce was really Caitlyn in her soul?
Bigot: Wait, what?
Bigot.
Why are you a bigot?
Bigot: Um, I am not a bigot, I just don’t care. That’s all. I really don’t think I need to think about this.
Bigot.
Please correct the error in the following name structure: “Mother Theresa, Martin Luther King Jr., 9-11 Responders who died, Harriet Tubman, Caitlyn Jenner.”
Bigot: I mean I have no idea? Wait why is …..
Shut It Bigot! Answer: “Caitlyn Jenner, Mother Theresa, Martin Luther King Jr., 9-11 Responders who died, Harriet Tubman.”
Bigot: I don’t know about this, Caitlyn Jenner ahead of people who burned to death trying to save people from a burning skyscraper and …
Bigot
Bigot: Honestly, could you please just stop calling me that. I am just saying maybe this story isn’t as big as say, the NSA spying on us, the drought, mortgage frauds, the Patriot Act expiring today…
Bigot retort. Bigotry bigoting at it’s finest. Classic bigoteering right there.
Bigot: Wait, what is “bigoteering,” is that a word?
Bigoteered me right in the chest. You should be in jail for bigoteering and causing harm and possibly death.
Bigot: Ok wait this is out of hand I am out of here.
Take your bigoting biggoty self right on out of here. This is how I KNOW you are a bigot.
